Monday 23 January
Rumours on twitter that Bobby Tambling, all time record goalscorer and all that, is in hospital in Ireland. We wish him well.

Tuesday 24 January
Norwich City reserves 3:3 Chelsea reserves
Lucas Piazon put us ahead in the first half but we needed two well taken late strikes from Islam Feruz to dig us out of our second-half hole. Bring your boots and gloves to the next match as injury and loans mean we struggled to find a goalkeeper. James Russell, Canvey Island’s stopper and youth team goalkeeping coach stepped in and pulled off a late save to keep things at three each.
Alex will not be going to QPR simply because our aspirant neighbours were unwilling to pay premiership wages. Where does that leave us? Well, Carlo over at PSG might take him, if not AVB has some major bridge building to get on with.
Meanwhile Anton Ferdinand has been urged to shake hands with John Terry before the game on Saturday. God knows why, if he wants to act the injured party like a six-year-old and sulk – let him. The police seem to believe that all the tension of the afternoon can be released with a handshake. We remember Sepp Blatter had the same idea a few months back but it didn’t catch on.
Meanwhile, the growing anger that the game will kick-off at 12 and is not on the telly threatens to boil over into open revolt, riots and running battles with Bill in the streets – apparently it was their idea.
Talking of injured parties Mario Balotelli’s agent has been explaining how hard done by he feels. The mentally-all-there Italian has been sent off three times since he arrived at City and his agent says he feels persecuted. He has a point on an afternoon when he was charged by the FA for stamping on Scott Parker, his English team mate was let off a blatant forearm-smash in the same game.

Wednesday 25 January
Kevin De Bruyne looks to be the next one in as Genk officials are apparently in town to finalise a £7m-ish deal. The expectation is that Kev will be loaned back to the Belgian champions until the summer.

Thursday 26 January
A moron sent Anton Ferdinand a bullet in the post as a threatening gesture ahead of Saturday’s game. We honestly thought this kind of stupidity was reserved for the sectarians north of the boarder.
Let’s be clear; whoever sent this cartridge is not a Chelsea fan.
They cannot have supported Chelsea when Paul Canoville played or Ruud Gullit, Gianfranco Zola or Didier Drogba. You cannot support a football team with players from so many different countries, so many different backgrounds and be racist. If you are still a racist given the nature of the club you support, we invite you to leave.
Given that level of stupidity it is hard to criticise Anton Ferdinand while he mulls over whether to shake John Terry’s hand. The simplest advice would be to grow up. Wayne Bridge looked a complete dick when he refused JT’s handshake over an alleged affair with his ex. That childish gesture has blighted his career ever since, managers don’t want to take on a player that sensitive to stories in the News of the World.
Buried under all that news Lucas Piazon signed a contract extension until 2017, so the nippy Brazilian will be around for a while to come.

Friday 27 January
Cote D’Ivoire 2:0 Burkina Faso
Didier set up Salomon this time for a sweet strike and the boys progress to the next round.
Alex will spend the next few years in Paris with PSG. Carlo Ancelotti completed the deal for £4.2m and has bought a talented and adaptable defender who has been a great servant in his time here. It is a shame to let him go for so little.
Kevin De Bruyne can expect a warm welcome from the boss. Andre Villas-Boas went out his way to explain that signing the young Belgian was not his choice: “You have to speak to the people from the club about that. It’s not within my immediate projects. He’s a player the club has scouted for some time. I’m a manager who respects club policy.”
He added: “A club has to look to the future, whether it’s with this manager or another. He’s a good bet for the future.”
Is there a hint in there that he feels he’ll be leaving soon, if not it is worrying for a couple of reasons. Firstly it suggests that AVB is not in control of signing players and, if he isn’t, we might as well give up now, and it might mean that in future managers will look elsewhere – who, after all, wants to work somewhere where they buy the players and you take the flack.
Meanwhile Kaby Djalo has left us for Cyprus and AEL in Limassol. Kaby is Portuguese by birth and won a FA Youth Cup medal during his time here.

Saturday 28 January
Queens Park Rangers 0:1 Chelsea
After the grope-the-public exercise outside (honestly, what was point of that? Was a crazed Chelsea fan going to bring a bazooka?) the rest of the afternoon was a bit flat. Punishing all of the class because two boys cannot behave the FA decided that it Anton and John were not going to shake then nobody would be allowed to.
Branislav Ivanovic made a welcome return at right-back with Malouda in for Frank. Gary Cahill made the bench.
Nothing happened in the first-half, at all.
QPR were dreadful throughout and the longer you watched them struggle the more you realised why there were so many gaps in the home seats. Not even QPR fans will pay to watch this rubbish.
Chelsea dominated, simply because QPR were hardly there. Mata’s cross resulted in the penalty. All the commentators since have said soft call or dive but really what is the difference between Clint Hill blundering into the back of Sturridge and David Luiz on Helguson. Except, of course, the latter, everyone agreed, was a nailed on penalty and Luiz was a joke and that brave Clint Hill was harshly done by a Chelsea con. Same old Chelsea, always…
Mata put away the penalty with ease and that was that. They mustered one serious shot on target with the last kick of the game but Cech pushed the ball wide.
The real worry is the injury to Ramires who was carried off after appearing to twist his knee. He could miss a vital part of the season with Europe in the near future.
Thankfully, we don’t have to travel up to White City again this season. Given that we have family members unfortunate enough to support them it is probably best for all concerned if they are relegated at the end of the season and we have a few years apart.

Norwich City youth 2:1 Chelsea youth
A bit of a sloppy start left the side two down at the break and unable to find a leveller despite, substitute, Ismail Seremba scoring late on. He had a beautiful lob ruled out for offside as well.
Ramires looks to have a meniscus tear and will miss at least four weeks.

Sunday 29 January
As a reward for yesterday’s plunder – all the papers have labelled us cheats – we will play Birmingham City at home.
Brighton and Hove Albion go to Anfield while Spurts will be knocked out at Stevenage